This is Beautiful

And all I see
It could never make me happy
And all my sand castles
Spend their time collapsing

Let me know that You hear me
Let me know Your touch
Let me know that You love me
Let that be enough

I just ran into Dr. Patton in the auditorium. I was there checking out the rehearsal for the upcoming musical "The Paradise Hotel". It's going to be great... but anyway... I got to talking with Dr. Patton and he mentioned that he was glad that I came back to the school. I was thinking seriously about transferring last semester. In response to his statement I heard myself say, "Yeah, I thought a change in geography would be able to change was was going on inside. A lot has moved... and I haven't had to." I realized in that moment how much really has changed in my heart and mind without having to run from this place or these people. So much has been and is being restored in my life. The scars remain, reminding me that in Christ I am strong and have overcome, and the sorrow returns to remind me of love lost and time stolen, but also to remind me to love deeply and spend time wisely. Then we started talking about Kyle.

Patton brought up this scripture...


11 I have seen something else under the sun:
The race is not to the swift
or the battle to the strong,
nor does food come to the wise
or wealth to the brilliant
or favor to the learned;
but time and chance happen to them all.

12 Moreover, no man knows when his hour will come:
As fish are caught in a cruel net,
or birds are taken in a snare,
so men are trapped by evil times
that fall unexpectedly upon them.

Basically... life is not fair.

Life happens. To us all. Wicked men live long in their wickedness and righteous men die young. But, there is a day coming when all this world will be restored. Amen?

Kyle lived his life as a servent... he loved his neighbor as himself and love God with all his heart, soul, and mind. He led a rich and meaningful life and helped the Lord influenced and changed me in his life almost as deep as God has through his death.

The women I babysit for is now a widow with two special needs children, a 10 year old, and a lot of things to pay for. Her husband committed suicide last year. I don't know much about the story... but her eyes tell me that her battle is not yet finished.

We do not know when our hour will come. To experience death... or to experience great sorrow.

The rain falls on the just and the unjust.

Our one oversweeping promise is that the God of Heaven and Earth loves us and will hold us through it all. None of us did anything to deserve the loss of Kyle and Kyle most certainly didn't deserve to die. And, Laurie (mom that I 'sit' for) did nothing to deserve abandoment and sorrow. But Christ, our Saviour, holds her. Her quiet strength and deep faith speak to me so much.

And God held me through the entirtly of the sorrow of the loss of Kyle and still holds me today while restoring joy and meaning to my life. How beautiful is this promise? In a world that deals out fortune and sorrow equally among the wicked and righteous, we have the promise of Christ.

Let that be enough.